Film Review: Christine (1983)

I’m one of the many who watches more spooky things in the month of October. I get in the odd mood for horror, but usually I watch the bulk of them in October. I’ve also been trying to watch more classic movies just in general. I’d heard about Christine before, and I know of John Carpenter’s other films, but I never got around to this one. I also didn’t realise it was by Stephen King until after, so that’s a fail on my part. For anyone who’s a fan of vintage cars and classic horror, this one is definitely worth a go.

Some spoilers herein

The film follows Arnie, a high-schooler who is frequently bullied. He’s best friends with Dennis and the pair of them face off against the bullies together. Arnie and his mum have a complicated relationship that only worsens when he impulsively decides to buy ‘Christine’, a vintage 1958 Plymouth Fury. Little does anyone know – except the seller – that the car has a dark history.

Arnie fixes Christine up and soon the car is in pristine condition, but Arnie starts to change as time progresses. He starts getting more confident, bolder. He also starts getting meaner and more violent. Any word against his car sets him off. Things only worsen when he starts to date Leigh. Christine seems almost … jealous. (Yep.)

After Leigh almost dies, she blames Christine and parts ways with Arnie, who won’t hear a word about it. Leigh turns to Dennis, who’s also starting to have his concerns about the car, and the pair decide they have to do something about it.

The soundtrack in this film was excellent, so that has to be mentioned first. Old horror really had a knack for those soundtracks. The CGI is fantastic – I was really impressed by the car fixing itself scenes – and the film relies on soundtrack, atmosphere and surprise more than loud screams, like so many others.

My one biggest nitpick is the standing in the centre of the road. There are WAY TOO MANY scenes where the characters could go literally in any other direction and yet they do not move out of the car’s path. One scene in particular keeps panning out from Leigh as she just … stands there, staring at the car, not moving. For. Ages. Gurl, I get that you’re scared, but move out of the fucking way! Oh my gosh. My partner and I kept looking from the screen, to each other, to the screen, to each other, and still Leigh did not move. It made no sense. Why wouldn’t you move?! The car isn’t even barrelling at her. It’s literally creeping towards her and she watches it. All I could think of is that scene in How I Met Your Mother where Barney is learning how to drive and doesn’t turn the wheel. (Also that scene in Bob’s Burgers where Tina’s learning to drive, but now I’m just wildly off topic …)

That said, overall it’s a really solid film and I’m definitely going to try and watch more John Carpenter soon.

Also, Dennis stole this whole movie. Four for you, Dennis. You go, Dennis!

Film Review: Venom (2018)

I wanted a movie that was going to cheer me up and I’m so glad I picked Venom. It’s honestly the funniest movie I’ve seen in a while and probably one of the best superhero movies I’ve ever seen. I only realised after I watched it that it didn’t get great reviews – well, SILLINESS. IGNORE THE BAD REVIEWS, THIS MOVIE IS AWESOME SAUCE AND A KETTLE OF FUN. Tom Hardy is good in literally everything (Virgin Queen, Peaky Blinders, The Dark Knight Rises, etc.) but as I don’t keep up with movies at all, I had no idea Michelle Williams and Riz Ahmed were in it too! Great casting, great movie.

The film follows Eddie, a reporter who wants to hold bad guys accountable for their crimes and doesn’t hold back on his opinions of their awfulness. Unfortunately, being a good reporter and a good person doesn’t sit well with his bootlicker boss, and Eddie gets fired when he goes after a corrupt scientist, Carlton Drake, and asks him about the cover-ups of his company. To Eddie’s horror, the move also gets his fiancée Anne fired, too. Furious, Anne breaks up with him, and in one day Eddie loses his job, his love, his apartment and his cat. Poor, poor Eddie. 😥

Drake’s experiments continue when his company uncovers an alien ‘symbiote’ and tries to match it with various human hosts. Horrified by his methods, one of his scientists seeks out Eddie to expose the truth. Unfortunately, everything goes wrong, and the symbiote gets inside Eddie.

Cue, DRAMA AND ACTION.

Venom, the alien symbiote, is hilarious. (And he takes deep personal offence to being called a ‘parasite’ FYI.) He and Eddie are basically a sarcastic duo fused together. Like if Jekyll and Hyde could talk to each other and liked each other, but were constantly duking it out. I giggled throughout their ensuing escapades, fending off bad guys and trying to sort out their shenanigans of being stuck together. Eddie tries to keep Venom good, Venom struggles with listening, but he likes Eddie and comes around to the idea of fighting for the good side. Plus, Venom’s commentary of how awesome Eddie’s ex is, is so funny.

10/10, totes recommend, ignore the bad reviews, this movie is a m a z i n g.

Film Review: Cellular (2004)

I remember watching Cellular waaaaaaaaaay back when it first came out. I think I was like eleven or something at the time. It’s been a while! But I do remember liking it, and when it popped up on my Netflix, I decided to rewatch it. And you know? It’s a pretty decent action movie and the actors really make it fun. It’s got Kim Basinger, Chris Evans, William H. Macy and Jason Statham.

The film definitely couldn’t have been done today (like Phone Booth, anyone remember that one? Also written by the same guy, as it happens) as there’s a lot of old tech glitches that are long since avoidable – like being on the phone and getting your lines crossed with someone else in a car nearby. Ahhh, the old days of mobile phones!

The plot is fairly straight forward: a woman, Jessica, is kidnapped and manages to use a broken rotary phone to dial an unknown number. The guy on the other end, Ryan, picks up, she asks him for help. Ryan at first thinks she’s joking, but he’s convinced to go to the police station where he encounters Mooney, a cop ready to retire and start his day spa with his wife. Mooney directs Ryan upstairs, but at the same time, Jessica learns that the kidnappers are going after her son. With few choices and no way of calling Jessica back if the signal dies, Ryan decides to get her son first. And so begins the chase!

Chris Evans is great in this, and I really liked William H. Macy’s comedy. Kim Basinger is a badass, too! Honestly, the whole cast are great. For a good action film, I totally suggest this one.